he cheated, I wanted to leave, the love bombing started “oh baby I love you so much, I don’t want to lose you” I stayed, I stayed while he cheated, and not just with England but with andromeda, Arizona, and splash. Just to name a few of the ones I knew about. More than once he left me for these girls and I hung around, sometimes I moved on but everytime I came crawling back I took him back. I remember the first time he physically hurt me, he shoved me out of bed and I busted my knee open, it was so out of the blue, he blamed it on a dream, told me he didn’t mean to, I accepted that. I knew then that something was off. Many times I would have to wake him up for work and DREAD would consume me, I hated it, he would blame me if he missed work because he didn’t get up and he would be angry at me and call me names and berate me for waking him up for work. There was no winning. I turned into a shell of a person with him. I changed everything that made me, me just to be with him. Slowly but surely he isolated me, he would tell me that I can tell him anything, I don’t need to talk to my mom or my brothers or my cousins, I can tell him anything, I don’t need to have friends and how dare I say things to them that I haven’t said to him. If I spoke to anyone about how he really was he would make days of my life hell, either by giving me the silent treatment or by making sure that I knew what a worthless piece of trash I was. I tried to leave so many time. One night before we got married, it was my birthday and he told me we would go out after the football game, it was the biggest football game of the season and I was living with him at his dads. That day I went to work and he told me I couldn’t come home and to go to my moms, turns out he had invited England to his dads and was trying to be with her. When that fell through he of course picked me up and made me believe everything would be fine. We went to universal once and he decided to spend the whole trip out looking for other girls and ignoring me the whole time.
